The Truth About Anti-Feminists & Why I Advocate For Men

SO, I know this blog has strayed a fair bit from its title (Maybe I should change it; suggestions?) as my posts invariably meander more towards social issues, political issues, etc, along with chronic illnesses and the like. That is a trend that isn't likely to change any time soon, and this post isn't going to be any different.

Feminism is at the forefront yet again. Lately I - and other women of my ilk - have been getting judged more and more simply on the fact that we're anti-feminist without the individual taking any consideration of, nor any time to learn about, who we are as individuals. They assume we surround ourselves with misogynists, or that we have internalized misogyny. They assume we aren't for equality. They assume we're all from one political party, even.

Nothing could be farther from the truth. Anti-feminists are as diverse a group as feminists are in color, height, weight, religion, political party and sexuality. We aren't misogynists, we don't have internalized misogyny, and the overwhelming majority of us (there are always exceptions to any group) are pro-equality.

Speaking for myself, the very core of my attitudes on equality, the people I seek to help and advocate the most for aren't, in fact, women - they're men. This also gets me a lot of flak, but really, an equality movement shouldn't condemn me for this. You see, men need advocates - not only from their own sex, but they need women, too, to realize that they have issues, many of them the very same that women face, and some areas, as I've mentioned in other blogs and will briefly rehash here, women have the upper hand on.

Since the FBI's change of definition of rape in 2012 (largely thanks to feminism) being 'forced penetration' men can, by law, no longer be raped by women. They can only be sexually assaulted which is a much lesser, and far more trivializing, crime. Forced engulfment happens and quite often - perhaps even almost as often as forced penetration of male-on-female rape - but because of the number of victims who don't come forward and the change in the definition of rape, the actual statistics are extremely difficult to calculate. Male-on-male rape happens frequently as well; and men too have, just like women, to watch their drinks and ensure they aren't slipped a drug, and be wary when out and about alone at night lest they be attacked. Men aren't invulnerable, in fact, men are more likely to be mugged than women. This is something that not only needs to be considered but brought into understanding.

Domestic violence is also an issue; men are victims quite nearly equally to women, and often the female is the aggressor. In reciprocal violence, it's been found that women are equally as violent in the relationship as men, though, as I've mentioned before, if police are called, only the man would go to jail unless he himself has marks on his person. There are many, many, many domestic violence shelters and hotlines in this country for women, yet only one shelter for men, and I'm unsure if there's even a hotline for men. Perhaps one? Two? This is an area that is woefully kept in the shadows and needs to be pulled into the light; domestic violence in any form, to any gender, has to stop. A man may have the muscle to take the blows of a woman, but the emotional damage is still there, the psychological damage is still there, and it is STILL ABUSE. It isn't funny or cute or being a strong woman to hit a man. It's being an abuser.

As I mentioned jail above, let's go over that - if a man commits a crime, and a woman commits the same crime, the man will always get the harsher sentence. Always. Hell, a woman videotaped herself raping her one year old son and got a slap on the wrist. 8 months probation I think it was? (Correct me if I'm wrong, please; it may have been 8 months in jail. Just the same. Ridiculously light sentence for that shit.) Women teachers have sex with students all the time and walk away without jail time. Men? BEHIND BARS YOU GO! Always. It doesn't matter WHAT the crime is, men will receive harsher sentencing. It's almost as if the criminal justice system is telling women, 'Aww, you poor thing, you have a uterus, it's okay if you act out and break the law, we understand.' It's disgusting, and it needs to stop. Equal time for equal crime!

Then there's genital mutilation. Circumcision. Yeah, it's elective. But it's become so common it's ABNORMAL for parents -not- to do it. You're literally mutilating the penis of your baby without his consent, because he can't fucking consent, forever. It needs to stop. There's no benefit to doing it, in fact there are drawbacks to doing it - multiple - and yet people just keep on chopping off the foreskins! How about leaving it alone and if, when that baby grows up into an adult, he can decide for himself to get it done if he chooses to. Circumcision can be done as an adult, it isn't too uncommon actually. So in this day and age of recognition of  bodily autonomy, why are we taking away the bodily autonomy of our sons in such a way? Changing his body forever in a way that can never be undone? Let him decide when he's old enough and mature enough to make the decision himself.

Lastly, stop shitting on men just because they're men. Seriously. I see the #NotAllWomen hashtag, and even the #YesAllWomen hashtag, because some of you are bold enough to attempt to speak for an entire gender (and by the way, half of the yes all women shit I disagree with, so no, not all women) for whatever reason, but if you can sit there and do that, why is it so hard for you to even entertain the idea of, much less accept, the fact that not all men are the same? Because they're not. Literally every single man is different because... *GASP* THEY'RE INDIVIDUALS. OMG! WHO WOULD HAVE FUCKING THOUGHT THAT?! Stop treating an entire gender like shit because some of them are assholes. Yes, some men are rapists, but guess what? So are some women. And some ducks. And some Dolphins. And my friend's dog to my leg. (Yes, I'm half-joking here, but really, I have to or I'm going to break something.) The only thing treating anyone like shit is going to do is make you look like a horrible person, and if you're getting your rocks off on treating someone like shit? You really ARE a horrible person.


All of that being said. Men, if I've left anything out, or if there's something you'd like my view on as a woman, feel free to drop me a comment or zap me a DM on Twitter ( @librumtinia )

Feminists, if you have anything to contend, the same goes with you.

Anyone else, if you have anything to say, any questions, comments, etc, drop a comment or a DM!